The Love ‘Issue’

I was at a braai the other day, as we South Africans tend to do. Met a dude there while watching some rugby (another thing we take pretty seriously). As it happens we enter into the normal –get to know how awesome I am without bragging- conversation. The thing that caught me completely off guard was what transpired next. He decided after these 5 minutes that he knows me well enough to share with me his take on life, which is this… ‘Life is about power. The more power you have, the more sex you get. The more sex you get the more power you have.’

I try my best not to judge people, we all miss the mark pretty often, but I was so positively mortified by the way this comment blind-sided me that I am pretty sure he could see it in my face, no matter how hard I tried to fight it. I think this was exactly not the effect he wanted to have; instead, he was trying to prove his theory to me by now becoming the ‘alpha male’ by going into a discussion about his numerous sexual conquests. (funny how that backfired, since this discussion seemed to come to an abrupt end.) However, the issue lies deeper than his world view. This world view comes from somewhere, which means it is something that has been applied in practice and thus far has proved at least somewhat successful…. So what he was telling me was that there are actually women who fall for this sort of thing? Well, this is something he showed me later that same evening as one of his next victims was falling for his charm very publicly.

This series of events deeply disturbed me since I had been on a journey of love over the past 11 months where I had resolved some of my misconceptions on the matter. Truths I thought were well known to everybody but me. Evidently not the case… I was compelled to write this article regarding my current understanding on the subject.

During my journey of discovery on this subject, I have been told to apply some more discipline in my life. This disciple ranged from what I watch and do, to what I listen to and what conversations I engage in. What I have found is cancer…

(Sounds like something John Conner would say, in my head at least. :P) It is a brain cancer that is slowly starting to affect every part of our existence. As the tumour grows it starts pressing on different centres of our minds defiling our understanding of basic values. Let me try to paint the picture this way: In my previous article, I alluded to the fact that we are expressions of God’s love. As such we are trying to interpret what this means and looks like in practice. What we have managed to come up with is cancer suppressed idea that has been reduced to the physical. Love has become sex. And sex, well that has become a tool for dominion and power.

See, cancer spreads in certain environments, and what we have managed to construct in our iniquity is a utopia. Listen to our music. It has become so blatantly sexual in nature, even the pop stuff, that it makes me uncomfortable. Our movies, now I’m taking mainstream romantic comedies and the interpretation and workings of love they proclaim to be the ideal, the ‘perfect’ we all wish to have in our fairy tales, is a shadow of what love really is. Read our novels and realize that people have become so obsessed with the sexual that it has become somewhat cheap. Almost like a show.

What we have achieved as a result is a disconnected society that is obsessed with personal gain in all aspects of life. People experience with sex to questionable extremes because they are unsatisfied with the current ‘product offering’. Well, if you condense it to an act, would you expect any different?

No people, what I suggest is an alternative. I suggest we go back to the beginning. We will never truly understand love unless we examine it not as we have come to interpret it, but as it is in its purest form. What is love, really?!

I don’t know. People have told me on multiple occasions to quit this ridiculous line of questioning since love is something the mind cannot comprehend. This likely is the case, but what I do know, and plan to show in my next post is this….

“We were meant to live for so much more, but we lost ourselves.”  – switchfoot.  “There’s gotta be more to life than this. There’s gotta be more to everything I thought exists.”- POD.

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One comment

  1. AJ · November 18, 2012

    Yup.. modern society.. even among Christians, have a completely distorted view of love. Or rather they have a very one dimensional view of love.
    This article is very relevant: http://traditionalchristianity.wordpress.com/2012/11/14/love-as-a-commodity-of-sex-or-the-self/

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